Tomas questions.aiff: this aiff audio file was automatically transcribed by Sonix with the best speech-to-text algorithms. This transcript may contain errors.
Scarlet:
And if there's any of these that you don't want to answer I'll have another one, so don't worry.
Tomas:
Ok.
Scarlet:
What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Tomas:
My idea of perfect happiness is not attempting to be in happiness, to be as mindful, aware, and present as I can, and dig whatever that is.
Scarlet:
What is your greatest extravagance? Because you don't seem like a very extravagant person, so I thought this would be an interesting one.
Tomas:
I assume you mean I'm not so extravagant materially. If the viewer or the reader could see me.
Scarlet:
I would call you down to earth down.
Tomas:
Thank you, Scarlet.
Tomas:
I would imagine for myself my extravagance is my creative meanderings into fantasies about what if, what if this, what if that, and it can be frustrating if I'm not doing something with it, with any of it. But enough things get actualized that it makes the process gratifying and worthwhile.
Scarlet:
What is the quality you like the most in a man or woman?
Tomas:
Their success at being themselves or their success at being who they are. I don't think any of us get very close to it, but when I am around someone that's beyond other people- who probably live automatically according to norms and conventions – then I really feel a lot of good energy from that.
Scarlet:
Is that because you think their authenticity breeds your authenticity?
Tomas:
I hope so. Whatever my authenticity is. I am good at fooling myself. I'm good at imagining things about myself that probably are not right or true or correct.
Scarlet:
Like what?
Tomas:
Like being authentic, or being down to earth, or being honest. Wow! How about if we look at what is honesty? I mean that's a big, big subject. How honest I my with myself? And that's honesty and truth – true to ourselves, honest with ourselves. How valuable am I to my world? Am I positive in my world, or am I negative? Do I take more than I give, or do I give more than I take? Those sort of things.
Scarlet:
Which talent would you most like to have?
Tomas:
Talent is different to a quality, isn't it? Well, what about communicating? I so respect people that can write or speak in a way that is not only correct but is engaging. Usually when someone engages my attention it's got something that I haven't seen before in terms of the style. I guess style is also something..but is that more of a talent? No that's more of a quality. I admire the style of communication of any kind, written and/or spoken.
Scarlet:
If you were to die and come back as a person or thing what would it be?
Tomas:
Well, I think it would certainly be a person. I can't imagine the fantasy of being another living being, whether it's plant or animal, other than a human. And would it mean a human that is either alive now or has been alive?
Scarlet:
Could be.
Tomas:
Wow, there are people that I so admire, like Muhammad Ali, John Steinbeck, Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi. So, If I could imagine being anywhere near the qualities of those men I would be pretty overwhelmed I think with gratitude.
Scarlet:
Only two left. What is your most marked characteristic?
Tomas:
My most marked characteristic. Of course, I will admit to being challenged by questions, the answer of which would seem to be dependent on others rather than my own self. And this one does seem to be one of those.
Scarlet:
That's a good point.
Tomas:
Maybe the others have been that way too.
Scarlet:
What have other people most commonly remarked about you? Because I saw this post on Facebook awhile ago where a guy you knew, you saw him again after a long period of time, and he called you a father figure to him, and said that you were very important to his development. Now I was wondering when I read it if there were a lot of people that see you as a father figure.
Tomas:
You can't believe.. first of all, I have been a father since I was 21 years old. And I've got four sons and I'm still a father, so I'm not only a father figure to myself but I am a father. I'm still very, very active with fathering. And it is so incredible to me how I am a father to many people that I come into contact with, who either their father is dead or their father split when they were very, very young. So, There's something in me I'm sure. Oh- you didn't ask this question, but I want it on here if I can insert it…One of the things I really aspire to is taking responsibility for what comes in my life. I believe that who I am dictates what I do, and what I do dictates what comes back to me. And taking these father figure matchups with me, I've got to have a big part in that, I think. And so what is the energy, the magnetism that I put out to attract these males that actually do not have a living father or a father that they've ever known? I don't know. It's pretty fascinating to me.
Scarlet:
That might be one of your marked characteristics.
Tomas:
Oh yes.
Scarlet:
I think I would say as an outsider, since you said it's an outsider's question..
Tomas:
Yes..
Scarlet:
You're somebody who is trustworthy and non-judgmental and patient. And I think as a father figure. Those are all things that everybody would love to have.
Tomas:
Thank you very much. Thank you, Scarlet, for those comments. I take those graciously, thanks.
Tomas:
You didn't know what you were getting into with these questions, did you?
Scarlet:
But that's the fun of it!
Tomas:
Yeah.
Scarlet:
So the last one, and you might not have one, but what is your motto, Or what would be your motto?
Tomas:
I do not have a motto. But I believe pretty much all the things I've just gone on about, spewn out, so far could be turned into mottos. For instance, I like to take responsibility for my life. I hope I'm a good communicator. I hope I'm able to have relationships that are of value to the other persons. And my motto actually right now, timely wise, is I've lived my life on my own terms as much as I could. I don't believe anybody probably is able to lead their lives on all their own terms, but I've done my best to do what I've done in my own way. And that finally I've got no regrets.
Scarlet:
Thank you so much for your honest answers.
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